i swim for brighter days.

I’m shouting your name all over town.

I don’t know what’s going on.

Your plaid shirt, and those shoes you wore today. Ah, darling, you make me go crazy, you really do. Let me just admit it…let me just admit that I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore. I can’t decide if I love you or if I never want to see you again. Honestly, I think it’s a combination of both. I love you so much that I wish you’d just disappear, because I know we can’t ever happen. But why is it that no matter what happens, it’s just always you that I come back to. Every time. I wish I could just tell you how I feel, but you’d never love me back. I mean, I’m not skinny, I don’t have long hair, I hardly wear makeup, I’m really awkward…and you’re…you’re a prince. You deserve a princess, and it truly breaks my heart that that can never be me. It really does.

Sometimes I wonder what life would be like if I was beautiful. Not the whole “beautiful-in-her-own-way” type of beautiful…but the kind of beautiful that just gets everybody. The kind of beautiful that radiates past cities and over mountains. The kind of beautiful that turns heads and makes people fall in love at first sight. If I had that, would things be different with us? I mean, you’d still be all I want…but would I be all you wanted too? It scares me to think about.

There was a million things I could’ve done today. A million ways I could’ve told you I loved you. And yet I couldn’t even manage one. 

• Nothing - The Script